Hello… I wonder if anyone ever checks this anymore since I tend to take so long between posts! :^)… I wish I could write just a little something each day like my other seasoned blogger friends, but the daily details of my life aren’t too exciting and my observations on things seem to take too long to form in my mind… Is it my age? I know I had a birthday recently, but… mercy! I saw an ad yesterday on TV about some game you can buy that sharpens your mind and helps with your memory… I thought- I need that! I really do!… So I guess it’s not just me! That comforts me a little… but only a little! :^)
I do think that a lot of my muddle-brainness (a new word! Yay!) comes from where I am in life. I like categories, labels, titles… where am I Lord? Which season is this? Am I here or there? I’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps I’m neither here nor there! I’ve been hearing a lot of prophetic words about ‘transitions’. I can relate, but what are we transitioning to? There IS the sense of change in the air, yet I’ve felt that for quite some time… I’ve become accustomed to it, perhaps have grown tired in it and have lost the sense of anticipation… At first waiting expectantly… then waiting… waiting… waiting… sigh… waiting… yawn…waiting… I am reminded of the ten virgins in the Bible. They were waiting for the Bridegroom. Some grew tired, they were lulled to sleep in their waiting… then when the transition began, they were dull, sleepy, unprepared, and they missed Him!
I heard a teaching at Brownsville about being in “the hall” of transition. In a house, you have many rooms… You have the kitchen, where people gather and eat. You have the living room where they sit and fellowship. You have the bedroom where they rest. Then you have THE HALL…. What do we do in a hall? Do we sit down? There are no chairs in the hall… There isn’t a bed in the hall… There’s not a stove or a table in the hall…Compared to the other rooms, a hall seems kind of pointless. But wait! It does have a purpose… it is to get you from Point A to Point B. There’s no escaping the hall. If you want to get from the bedroom to the kitchen in my house, you must access the hall… The chairless, empty hall… I never sit in the hall… I keep moving… It is a necessary passageway… I guess it would be kind of abrupt to walk out of my private bedroom into the very public kitchen… The hall sort of gives me time to adjust… I enter the hall with purpose, not just to hang out or to rest, I am moving towards something… Transitioning...
So having said all of this- I am in the hall… I have been for a very long time. All I know is that it must be a very long hall! :^). Keith has been in the hall longer than I have… We have recently become very discouraged and disappointed that we are still in the hall. Perhaps that’s why I have neglected this blog … It seems there have been no great revelations to share from this hall…nothing much to see, nothing much to report… Discouragment often hangs out in this hall... Who wants to hear about that? Confusion also.... I have wondered at times if the enemy was in this whole hall business. Perhaps he even built the hall! He certainly seems to prolong it at times… Although I know that everything in our lives is Father-filtered, our enemy has certainly whispered in our ears that this hall will go on forever… We might as well SETTLE down here, lie down, give up and stop moving… But NO! The hall is meant for movement. You must not stop moving in the hall. That's what it's made for! And the hall eventually does lead to some place else, IF we don’t stop….We are NOT meant to be here forever….But at times we MUST be...
However, there is something very good about this hall after all…. He is here. There are fewer distractions in the hall. It is here that the Lord teaches TRUST. He whispers to those of us in the hall, ”Will you trust Me?” When we don’t see the end, yet we wouldn’t ever want to go back to where we were before- will we still trust Him? Is He trustworthy? Now to this I have a definitive, non-muddled answer- YES! Absolutely, completely, totally- YES! We may not know where this hall is leading us, but we do know Who is with us, Who loves us, Who won’t disappoint us and Who has a great plan for our lives-beyond the hall and even IN the hall! A better plan than we could ever ask for or imagine. He is the Master-builder of this house. His ways are infinitely higher than ours. And He is our Hope! I want to finish this post today with the words from a song that I wrote several years ago when I was in another darker “hall”. Sometimes, in the hall, all we can know is that He is good. He is true….but friend- that is enough! God bless!
“When my dreams are passing by,
And disappointment steals my song
I don’t understand Your ways
And I doubt all that I’ve known
Just one thing, I know to be true… Is You
When my plans have come to nothing.
Hope deferred it clouds my view
When I don’t feel so special
And my thoughts become confused
Just one thing I know to be true…. Is You
You are true, You are true. And my hope is in You
You are righteous, You are just. In Your word will I trust
For Your love won’t let go. And that’s all I need to know.
You are true… Lord… You are true.
Only You can satisfy, in this world of constant change
Seasons come and go but I
Know Your word remains the same
Just one thing I know to be true… Is You
You are true, You are true. And my hope is in You
You are righteous, You are just. In Your word will I trust
For Your love won’t let go. And that’s all I need to know.
You are true… Lord… You are true.”
10 comments:
There are three blogs I check on a daily basis and this is one of them. Thanks for the post. Your right about God being here in the hallway. As long as God is here, it's OK by me if the time lasts.
I feel like I've been underwater and said "OK God, I can hold my breath this long so I'm sure you'll move by then." When my timeline ran out and the circumstances were the same, I came up with a new timeline. God didn't follow that one either.
Now I'm trying to focus on Him and be content if I stay underwater for an indefinite period. As long as he's sustaining me, why should I care if I'm in or out of the water.
Shadrach Meshach and Abednego could have lingered in the fire. There was no need to rush out of it. What was there that was any better out of the fire. Being in the fire with God is certainly more interesting than being out of the fire talking with Nebuchadnezzar.
I keep thinking that when God has me truly content underwater (or in the hallway), there will not be any more need to be here. As long as I'm eager to get out instead of focusing on Him here, then I probably will remain.
These are ramblings of thought, and I've not tried them by the truth of the scriptures. I don't have many answers right now, but I absolutely agree that God is here!
I imagine that this is God's grinder . He grinds the grain so that it becomes flour he can use to make bread. (Isa 28:28)
When I become flour there is nothing left to grind. As long as I can resist the grinding wheel, I must still be a kernel or a grain chip. There is still need for the season of grinding. It will continue until I'm suitable for His use. I'm confident that He's grinding in love with what is BEST in mind.
Lord, keep me here until your satisfied.
I woke up this morning and thought of a song by Michael Card, “In The Wilderness”. I believe this fits with your blog since the wilderness was the hall between Egypt and the Promised Land. I decided to type the lyrics as a comment on your post and found that Michael Card has written and intro paragraph to the song. What follows is what Michael has written.
Every significant event in the history of salvation happens in the wilderness. In its own way it is a more blessed place than the Promised Land. The children of Israel wandered there searching for the land of promise, Jesus was driven there by the Spirit where His Sonship was established through the temptation. And today, God leads us to the wilderness as well so that we might learn how much we need Him.
CHORUS
In the wilderness
In the wilderness
He calls his sons and daughters
To the wilderness
But He gives grace sufficient
To survive any test
And that’s the painful purpose
Of the wilderness
In the wilderness we wander
In the wilderness we weep
In the wasteland of our wanting
Where the darkness seems so deep
We search for the beginning
For an exodus to home
And find that those who follow Him
Must often walk alone
CHORUS
In the wilderness we’re wondering
For a way to understand
In the wilderness there’s not a way
For the Way’s become a man
And the man’s become the Exodus
The way to holy ground
But wandering in the wilderness
Is the best way to be found
CHORUS
Groaning and growing
Amidst the desert days
The windy winter wilderness
Can blow the self away
CHORUS
And that’s the painful promise
Of the wilderness
See, I'm not the only one still reading your blog :P
Now, about this "hall"...good stuff...I think I've been there, too, for many years. I think sometimes our expectations of how long the hall is, or where that hall is taking us and what we will find there, gets in our way. And for me, the Lord is bringing me to a place of only expecting Him...His Presence, alone. Then, no matter what the circumstances look like, it won't hinder me, b/c my only desire is Him.
I just read an EXCELLENT book called, Anonymous: Jesus' hidden years, by Alicia Chole. I highly recommend you read it. Go to this website: http://www.onewholeworld.com/
and click on the picture of the book on the right, there's a video promo of it...I think you'll agree. If you'd like to read it before buying it, I have it and will gladly loan it to you :) Dave and I were both very encouraged by it!
'til next time, my friend!
Thanks for the comments and the song, Will. I really like your comparison of the hallway to the wilderness between Egypt and the Promised Land. That's a powerful insight. It's encouraging when you ponder the importance, the value, the BLESSING of "the hall". With that perspective, traveling through doesn't seem so bad!... Thanks!
Wow!!! Awesome! I'm in the hall too and it seems as though I have been here forever! What a challenge it is to wait on the Lord! To truly wait and trust him with everything! I am so glad you put your song in there! It is one of my favs!!!! I love you and thnk you so much for this word! What an encouragement! It is okay to accept that I am in the hall! Lord, have your way! Love you!!! Hoop
I actually have a chair in my hall...what does that say about me? : ) Good stuff,Sis...please sing that song in church soon...!
I love you...
Cathy
Guess Who?? I menat ot put this on the other day. Keep writing.
Keith 04/30/2006
Hidden. Hidden for a season but hidden for a reason, in the hands of God right now. "And though things and timing have not lined up as you have foreseen them, I am teaching you about Me," the Lord says. "Because it is about Me and not the thing and not the end. It’s about Me. It’s about knowing Me. Do not be discouraged when time lags and vision seems to dim," says the Lord. "They have not died. For you are hidden for this time to be equipped and the time will come where the release will come. The release WILL come! But wait patiently upon Me. I am doing a work within your heart. Within your heart. Don’t be discouraged. You have not been forgotten nor cast aside," says the Lord. "Draw to Me. Embrace, embrace what I am doing."
Hey momma! and everyone else Im her son Max, haha just puttin the word out that i have a blog. K luv u.
Max
Hey kayla....are you still in the hall?
Your husband was such a blessing Wed. night. It was anointed,and funny yet very serious! I had ears to hear the message anyways...
Tell him thanks for hearing from "daddy"!
Sonja
=) Wow! This was a very encouraging write Kayla! The whole transition, preparation thing has been coming up a lot with me too, and lately the things that I have been writing to God have involved questions of where I am going and will I ever get there and just asking for things to be clearer. I read this at a great time and I am blessed to be where I am, in this hall. Thank you for sharing your heart! Your amazing and a blessing!
Love you
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